Rage.....

I feel angry. I have no idea why either. When I used to have my maid around, I'll vent my anger on her by yelling. I now feel guilty for doing that. Now that she's gone, I have to find another place to get rid of all the rage. This feels like a safe place cause I know I don't have much readers so no one will know...

Sometimes I get mad at the littlest things but I try to not let it get to me. Occasionally I get mad at my parents but I don't really know why. I don't say it out because I'll seem like a disrespectful and unfilial daughter. I do yell at them sometimes but I hope they realize it's all unintentional... Although I know that there are people I can rant to but it just doesn't feel right to trouble others. Or rather most of the time I just don't feel safe. Maybe I don't trust people enough. I feel bad when people have to listen so I'll probably stop complaining.

Several times I get mad out of the blue. PMS or what, I don't know. Maybe mood swings. When this happens, I get upset over trivial matters. Should stop letting my annoyance get to others.. I should be more caring! Give more than I take!

My parents are going overseas this Saturday for 8 days. Which means I'll have the whole house to myself for 8 days. My brother is almost non-existent because he's only home after 8pm and he leaves at 10am for work. I wonder how I'll survive doing the chores (my last complaint). I am slow at doing chores. I may not have to vacuum the floor everyday but I don't like it when the floor is dirty. I tend to keep washing my feet.

So here's wishing for a happy forever Gillian and may the anger go away!

Ok cannot be selfish. I shall spread the love. Happy forever everyone!